By Wisdom Olobayo
“So, I have this neighbour who is super successful and popular. But we hardly ever speak to each other, considering that we, perhaps, have nothing to talk about on any level and she’s never really at home, even on weekends, except at night…sometimes. About a month ago, she employed a young lad—barely fifteen by the looks of him—as her house keeper. Until recently, I never heard any noise from her house. It was always quiet. There wasn’t even music on at any time. Recently, I hear the sounds of whipping and screaming. Constantly. Almost nightly. But I’m a feminist, and I have no business probing, asking questions, putting a call through to 112 (the police) or taking any measure whatsoever to help the plight of a man or boy or any kind of male person.”
But the truths you should know are that:
• FEMINISM IS NOT neglect for your duty towards humanity and society which includes MEN.
• FEMINISM IS NOT accommodating or turning a blind eye to oppression, brutality, cynicism, hatred towards men or women coming from a woman because it’s supposed to be “women supporting women”.
• FEMINISM IS NOT women trying to get even with men on the scale of wickedness.
“Because of the understanding of the rights that I have over my own body, to do with it as I please; at all times, with/without restraint as I see fit, and without fear of what people will say, I have made my choice to be unmarried so that I do not bear the burdens of family life and a career together. I understand that it is empowering to know and grasp the full extent of all I am entitled to as a human person.
I have a neighbour that I’ve known for four years. I remember when she got married. I remember that she used to be a banker before her marriage. Now she has three children and is a stay-at-home wife. I’ve befriended her for a while now and we talk about our day-to-day lives. She tells me she is content with her position as a full-time housewife. She says she is educated and understands the consequences of her choices in full. I respect her, and her choices…”
• FEMINISM IS NOT arresting the choices of other women to be whatever they want to be, either by intimidation or coax to become your version of “empowered”, “powerful”, “influential”, and even…”equal”.